Monday, November 16, 2009

take that, Signal hill!

you know what that is a picture of?
no, I didn't think so.
it's signal hill. I ran there. A whole 6k... and now Imma brag about it till the day I die.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Dear Santa...

Dearest Santy Clause,
Here's a list of things I would appreciate for Christmas. I've been a good girl this year... unlike that girl up there ^^^ or so I would assume.
1.) A new pair of jeans (my fat ass recently shed some pounds)
2.) A pretty journal (so I can continue to curse the mailman, the staff at work and whatever poor soul who happens to cross my path on a bad day)
3.) A plane ticket (My family needs me for the holidays... and I need me some grammas cooking)
5.) Another cat (because I'm going to save the world one kitty at a time)
6.) Peace on earth

p.s would it kill you to leave some cash in my stocking?

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Leave it to the Tyra show!

Only Tyra Banks would find someone like this for her show. I aint be hatin' or discriminatin' BUT WTF. Lauren, an energetic and lovable female openly discusses her TWO vaginas. I can't speak for anyone but myself here... but I have a hard enough time dealing with one.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Novembers Sex Tips Will Forever Remain A Mystery

Okay, so here's how things generally work. I give you money and in return, you give me what I paid for. It's not rocket science. Hell, even my brain can comprehend that. I hope you (cosmopolitan) sleep well tonight knowing that I will never know your 'mind tricks that melt pounds'

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Is anyone ACTUALLY going to read my blog?

Once upon a time there lived a young lady named Amanda. Amanda was a curious human being who had many MANY bad ideas. She wasn't exactly the brightest candle on the birthday cake, but she managed to get by. Leaving her friends and family at an early age, she set off for an adventure three thousand kilometers away. Still not knowing if it was the right decision or not, she was and still IS trying to make the most out of life. Now when it came down to it, Amanda wouldn't dare to speak her true feelings to anyone... except to her trusty sidekick Leo (the orange spawn of satan who disguised himself as an adorable kitty). So with the advice of a close friend she decided to start a blog where she could open up and be her true self. Bad mouthing whatever she wanted, sharing poems and stories and best of all informing her friends and family about what she has been up to. Amanda soon married her prince, the love of her life and they spent eternity together raising lots and lots of kids and rolling around in diamonds and cash. FIN.

ok so maybe that last part hasn't happened yet... but most of my story is true.